Braving the Boys - A Conversation with the Brave Ski Mom

Through my blog, I’ve come to meet many other moms who write about their family adventures in the outdoors. Today, the Brave Ski Mom and I share a short dialogue we recently had about camping, hiking and getting outside. We both have two sons. My boys are young, hers are both teens.  So what do we have in common? Are their some universal family experiences? Here’s a bit of what we found out. (Note - BSM will also be publishing this interview on her blog so feel free to pop over there if you have questions for her!)

How old are your children? When did you start taking them on outdoor adventures?

MM: Our boys are three and one.  They are happy, needy, BUSY and stubborn!   Our oldest was camping at about 10 weeks (and even though it was July, the nights were still freezing!) and our younger son went on his first camping trip at about 4 weeks (after 6 weeks of bed rest for me, I was desperate to get out so we didn’t wait!)  Both boys were preemies, but strong and healthy. 

Thanks to a Moby Wrap and my Boba 3G (both baby carriers) we were out hiking with both of them within three weeks.  Nothing strenuous and I was certainly checking them often, but they were out there (and so were we!)

BSM: Our boys are now 15 and 13. I am not sure how that happened, but it did and it does! Our oldest went on his first expedition when he was four weeks old. BUT, we didn’t go camping. Instead we went to the family cabin at 10,000 feet. He spent the entire weekend in a Patagonia fleece bunting, but we were out there hiking. He also slept through the night for the first time on this  (thank you high altitude air). Our younger son was born in April, so I think he probably went camping at about 8 weeks.

BSM 

When they were little, we carried them, but by about age 2, both boys were done with being carried and wanted to hike on their own. When they were little, we were very respectful of their size and stamina. As they grew, a big challenge for us was not interpreting their enthusiasm for strength and ability. We made some big mistakes talking them into “death marches.” These hikes were too long, in both distance and time, and they almost stifled our boys’ desire to hike. Just because a child CAN hike a long distance, doesn’t mean they should.

What do you find most challenging about hiking and camping with your children right now?

MM: The sleep factor when camping is pretty huge for us, unfortunately.  P (almost a year) still isn’t sleeping that great which means that when we are in a tent everyone is disturbed by him waking up.  However, I have resigned myself to the fact that it is just the way it is and WILL be for the next few years.  We think the sleeplessness is worth the memories.  The good news is after the first night, everything seems to get a little easier.  We also really need to watch the kids and make sure they aren’t getting too cold (even though it IS June here – mountain camping means cold nights most of the summer!)  Sleeping bags designed specifically for kids are absolutely worth the investment.

Other difficulties include the extra baggage cloth diapers (or really any diapers at all) make for packing and keeping P from eating everything he shouldn’t (dirt, rocks, deer poop, etc.)

BSM: Your kids are still too young for this, but one of the best things to ever happen to us was winning a tent. Actually our younger son, who was then 7, won the tent in a ski race. We had always tried to cram everyone into a small tent (thinking it would keep the boys warm and that it was more efficient somehow). When he won a tent, he and his brother graduated to sleeping together – alone. Their tent is right next to ours, but they are separate – separate mess, separate play space….separate!

The most challenging thing for us right now is finding time to go camping. We all love camping, it is one of our favorite family activities – whether car camping or backpacking. But once kids get involved in organized sports, the beautiful fall weekends are full. Spring blows by in the wind and summer melts before your eyes. Take advantage of camping as much as you can when your children are small and don’t rush to sign up for soccer. :0)

BSM Boys

MM: Oh….that sounds awesome!  And yes, I totally agree that finding time is hard.  We already struggle with that, and KNOW how important it is!

What do you enjoy most about being outside with your children?            

MM: Quite honestly, I am a happier person when I am outside and active, and I am just a better Mama overall.  In general, I am more patient, more understanding, more interactive and more present for my kids.  At home I get too bogged down too easily by all the things I have to do (and yet, I forget those things so easily when I am outdoors!  So, I enjoy myself better :)

But, I also see a difference in them.  They tend to be less whiney, less needy, more loving toward each other and happier over all.  I love their sense of wonder, how we have to stop and check out everything (as annoying as that can be sometimes) and all the laughter.  And, I am 99% sure it is NOT just my kids that act that way outside!  It is certainly not the 100% fool-proof solution to a happy day, but it sure helps (all of us!)

BSM: I can’t agree more. Being outside makes us all better people. For us, with young teenagers, outdoor time is all about camaraderie and stepping out of the rush. As busy as we were when our boys were young, our current schedule is on warp speed. Going camping together allows us to unplug and disengage from external events. We talk and laugh together in ways we wouldn’t at home. Time spent hiking, biking or fishing together is important, especially because of that word “together.” On the trail, we’re not competing for attention with work, school, friends and other responsibilities. We can just “be,” right where we are, together.

BSM

Any go-to gear you use as a family right now with the stage of life you are in?

MM:  Kid carriers are huge for us right now. They help us just get off and moving! We also love our Jetboil for quick hot chocolate (yep, even in the summer) and usually feel like snacks are coming out of our ears (does that count as “gear”??)

BSM: It’s funny, but gear actually does become less important as kids grow up (which is a relief!). Suddenly, you need much less stuff, but you always need good stuff. This spring we replaced our boys’ hand-me-down Thermarest pads, with brand new Thermarest Neo-Air pads. These are much cushier and weigh just about the same as the old ones. Plus, they’re longer.

I also agree with the JetBoil suggestion. Don’t we all need hot chocolate year-round and on-demand?

How long of hikes/camping trips do you usually do as a family? Any tips for families just starting out at your “stage” in the game?

MM: We have big plans for this summer of some multi-day backpacking trips and extended camping trips.  But, before that, it has just been a lot of car camping (bailing if the baby is losing it is easier that way….)  We’re excited to see how they go (and will report on the blog, of course!)    As far as hikes, the length varies, but day hikes could be anywhere from 3-6 miles average (some longer, some shorter.)  Our 3-year-old does a little riding, a little hiking.  We’re thankful he is still willing to ride at least long enough for us to be able to get where we want to go (usually.)

BSM: We’ve got some fun summer plans in the works, including a couple of weekends we spent near Telluride already this June. Next on our agenda is a camping trip in the Collegiate Peaks with friends from Germany. The big question in Colorado, of course, is the extreme fire danger. Right now, there is a fire ban anywhere outside of established campsites. We keep expecting to hear that even camping stoves may be restricted. Please! Do your rain dances! We need it!

And now, some questions for readers: What do think the benefits of outdoor activities such as hiking and camping are for your family? Where do you like to go? What do you enjoy doing? What are the biggest challenges you face? Any questions you have for either of us (we are both posting, so feel free to leave comments for either one on our respective blogs!)

Happy Adventuring!